Individuals take preventative measures in numerous areas of their life to ensure the longevity of their health and personal belongings. They go to the dentist once a year to take care of their teeth. They take their car in to get the oil changed and the tires rotated. When it comes to their personal relationships, however, they don’t always take the same approach.
While it makes sense to receive a relationship tune-up when things are not running smoothly, many individuals do not know where to begin. They have lost the ability to communicate with their loved ones. For example, difficult conversations may lead to feeling worse about the situation than before the discussion started. If the individuals do not communicate well, they may feel like their dialogue accomplishes nothing. These individuals may be beyond the point of constructive communication – either not talking at all or saying damaging things to each other. In these instances, such individuals could benefit from a little couples counseling.
The Thrill is Gone
Many couples with communication problems did not wake up unhappy one day out of the blue. Often, small, undiscussed grievances build up feelings of resentment over time. As a result, they may no longer feel any desire for each other even if neither has changed physically since the day they met. The couple may not know what caused the division in their relationship. It may be over-familiarity, hormones, age, or prolonged and unaddressed resentment. No matter what the cause of the discord is, it does not mean the relationship is dead. It can still be saved if the two individuals are willing to put in the work along with the help of one of the good relationship counselors available in the Washington DC area.
The Two of You Have Nothing in Common but the Children
A common cause of marital dissatisfaction is both parties stop focusing on one and other. They chose to focus on their children at the expense of their marriage. This is not always a conscious decision. Children place normal demands on their parents’ schedules, but many parents don’t also make the time for each other. For example, a couple may notice they are drifting and decide to go out on a date to rectify this. However, if too much time has passed they may find they know nothing about the other any longer. In fact, they may no longer care what their spouse does all day or how they feel. It may seem like it is too much work to carry on a meaningful conversation. The only thing these couples have in common anymore is their children.
So what happened to the days when they could talk for hours and could never know enough about each other? Work, children, and daily life schedules can consume a marriage when the spouses do not put enough effort into their relationship. If you can relate to this scenario, there is hope. You and your spouse can find your way back to each other with the help of a licensed relationship counselor like Joseph F. Lafleur can help you learn how to foster open and honest communicate with each other.